Wednesday, August 6, 2008

My Beautiful Boy!



My beautiful boy, Jessie, has decided that he wants to live with his Father in Cedar City and has been granted that wish by the courts. This was a very sudden and unexpected surprise to me and it has left me with a huge hole in my heart and like my heart has been ripped out of my chest. On July 5th I sent him down for a 3 week visit with his dad and then I learn a week or so ago that he is not coming back to me. He came back up here on Saturday to gather his things and left on Sunday. What a devastating day that was for me and for our family. I have been his mother for over 12 years and now I won't get the opportunity to mother him on a daily basis. My heart aches as I am mourning his absense. I am trying really hard to support his decision and really hope that for him it is the best decision, that he will truly be as happy there as he says he will be. I just want him to know how much I love him and how much I truly will miss him in my daily life, how much I will miss watching him play football and baseball, how much I will miss being there for him when he gets home from school, how much I will miss every single little thing that we all take for granted. Jessie I love you!

6 comments:

kim graham said...

I am in Shock!!!! I am so sorry. I can't even imagine what you must be feeling!!! Please let Jess know that Ryan will miss him. Sherrie just remember Heavenly Father doesn't give us anymore to handle then what he thinks we can. Even if it seem unbearable at the time. I am balling like a baby---- but please let Jess know that we will miss him and we love him.

Sherrie said...

Kim, Thank you for your kind words. I wish Jessie could understand the impact this decision has made on all those around him. I tried to tell him how it will affect EVERYONE. I can only hope and pray that he will find out sooner rather than later that the grass isn't greener on the other side and he will come home to me someday. Yes it's very difficult and unimaginable that this could have went this direction. It's a total shocking blow to me. Thanks for your friendship and understanding. Keep in touch!

Valerie said...

I was so sorry to hear about that. He will be missed! Mom is having a really hard time with the whole thing.

Sending you lot of hugs!

kathy said...

I am so sorry. I can't even imagine. Hopefully he will realize that his life won't be what he thinks it will be. Hang in there!

Anonymous said...

The Mills clan is definitely saddened by this event. The girls are already missing their cousin. Megan thinks she will never see Jessie again. It's been a tough blow for the whole Alldredge family. I pray that things will work out for the best. We love him so much. -Alicia

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry, Sherrie. I do know what your going through. Hang in there, he will eventually come around and realize all you have done for him. You will always be his Mom no matter were he is physically. Be patient and keep the doors of communication with him open. And as hard as it is to remember sometimes...remember you are the adult in this relationship and he is the kid and will not always be as mature as you would like in his responses to you. My thoughts and prayers for peace (of mind) are with you!!!

Your friend,
Valorie