Thursday, January 8, 2009

Glad today is over!

Today started out pretty good I thought, but ended up not being so good. Every single person I had to deal with today for work was mean, rude, ugly and many other words. By the end of the day I was angry and emotional and exhausted. I am also missing my husband who has been gone for a couple days and still isn't home and I am just so tired of dealing with all these emotions lately.

I am still fighting the blues. Some days I am happy and some days I just want to throw myself on the floor kicking and screaming with anger and then some days I just want to cry. And some days like today I experience it all. Whatever hormonal imbalance I am dealing with I just want it to go away! I hate how it is affecting me and those around me. I hate feeling out of control. It is not like me.

I have been working a lot lately, because we are swamped with work and we can use the extra money right now. But having to work more means not getting anything done around the house. I still have not taken down Christmas and the house is a disaster.. and that is really bothering me too because I like to have a house of order. Bill has been gone a lot for work and Shellise is extremely busy with school and all of her extracurricular activities. So there is no one to pick up the slack and help out.

I guess I am not dealing with things very well and I really hate that. I hope tomorrow will be a better day. And since I am so exhausted... I must get to bed and get some sleep.

I hope everyone reading this has a much better day and attitude than I have had.


Lara said...

I hope tomorrow (today!) will be better! Hormones can be a beast and everything just seems harder when we feel like that.

Kate said...

It does sound like you had an awful day just like me. I hope you are doing much better. It really helps when you have someone to vent to or help with some of what needs to be done. Too bad we don't live closer.

Vietta said...

I've had my struggles lately too. I went on an anti-depressant hoping to even out the mood swings and anger. Depression and Anxiety run pretty thick in my family. Well I was feeling really good for a few days then suddenly on day 6 I started having anxiety (panic) attacks. They were just one on top of another and by the next day I was in the ER. The docs took me off the Prozac and started me on something to calm the attacks. I went like that for 10 full days. It was like a trip through HELL! I've only had panic attacks like that - that bad - during a post partum depression after my last child was born 7 years ago. That struggle lasted 4 months. Honestly after what I've been through this month I cannot believe I managed to make it through that four months alive. I must really want to be here - that's all I can say. Any way, this whole thing has got me working out on the mini tramp twice a day for 15 minutes each, drinking water - not caffine - and cutting way back on sugar. I feel so much better now, it is an amazing difference. Oh, and regular sex helps too - ha ha! I'm sure as a newly wed that's no problem for you - but us well, lets just say we weren't getting around to it as often as we should have. Stress is so hard on your body and your mind. I have wondered if I've got a generalized anxiety disorder or something - but first I'm going to go see my GYN to make sure it is not a hormonal imbalance - getting to that age...

I'm glad that you are feeling some better - I hope this info is helpful. Love you - Vietta